Summary: I (the speaker) get overly confident in a game of Magic at our local game store, and end up losing after copious amounts of gloating. You (the listener) are quick to point out that I offered you something in the heat of the moment, and you insist I make good on my offer- even though we're in public. I'm not going to go back on my word, so it looks like I'm the one going down at this table. ... This is the version where I eat your pussy ...