Part of being your best friend for most of your life is listening to your horrible date stories and the one you're telling me today is probably one of the worst. What the fuck is this chick's problem? She gets off and leaves you hanging? Well, fuck that. What's the big deal? It's just sex. It's just a cock. Hell, you could fuck me right now if you wanted to, no joke. We've never done it before, but there's no time like the present, right? And I promise - I won't make you stop...