I have no experience in sales, but if I were to sell you on using me versus your tried and true sex toy, here are a few advantages I have: 1. No batteries needed 2. Self-lubricating 3. Self-cleaning (via swallowing or creampie) 4. Adjustable suction (confirm selection with key phrase ‘good girl’) 5. Real, pussy-clenching orgasms Disadvantages? 1. Needs to be fed at least twice a day 2. Known to use an obscene amount of sarcasm 3. Does not come with inconspicuous packaging So, what do you think? Would you use me?