A 15-Minute Ramble About Microphones from a Northern English Bloke Who Probably Should've Stayed QuietIf you've ever thought, "I wish a man from the North of England would waffle on about audio gear in a vaguely coherent way," then wow, are you in for a treat.
In this totally unscripted, mildly tedious 15-minute rant, I talk about the microphones I use for my voice, ways to sound less awful than your phone mic allows, and I even attempt (poorly) to explain what 32-bit float is — because who doesn’t want that in their life?
It’s full of thrilling content like:
“Why AirPods are not the peak of audio engineering”
“This mic makes me sound less like I live in a tin shed”
“What even is a bit, and why are there 32 of them?”
It's probably too long, marginally informative, and definitely not what anyone asked for.
But hey, someone might find it useful — or at least amusing in a ‘bless him, he tried’ kind of way.
Enjoy. Or don't. I already recorded it so... here we are.Play Count: 100 A Mindful & Melodic Morning Meditation - [Calming] [Nature] [Music] [Tongue Drum]I recently took my tongue drum out into the British countryside in the early hours of the morning, just as the birds were starting to sing and the sheep were waking up.
I set up a matched pair of omni microphones to capture the natural ambience around me — the subtle stirrings of the rural landscape — and used a directional Mid-side mic to record the tongue drum live as I played it.Play Count: 21 Miro The Moth & His Moonlight EscapeThis is a soft, original bedtime story I wrote and narrated — a calm tale for anyone who could use a gentle moment before sleep. It follows Miro, a thoughtful little moth who always sensed there was more to the world than the usual lights his village hovered around.
One stormy night, when all the familiar lights go dark, only the moon remains — distant, quiet, and glowing. And so begins his unexpected adventure.
I hope this story brings you a sense of calm and wonder as you settle in.Play Count: 129 [M4A] Let The Rain Wash It All Away [Comfort] [Affirmations] [Rain] [Thunder] [Soft Spoken] [British Accent] [Calming] [Intimate]I wanted to create something soft & comforting - a little space where you can just breathe, relax and let go for a while.
This audio combines gentle affirmations with the sound of real rain and distant thunder I have captured through audio design work I do. It's been layered together with my voice to hopefully create a cosy & peaceful atmosphere.
It's meant to be something you can return to whenever you need a moment calm or a quiet reminder that you're doing okay and that it's perfectly okay to rest.
There's no role-play or plot here - just a calm presence and support.
My hope is that this can help many people.
The rain and thunder storm continues for a while after the speaking ends so you can just immerse yourself in that sound.Play Count: 195 Steamy Hot Tub Sex [M4F]A moment between us in the Hot Tub becomes incredibly intense & steamy.
Features a binaural audio recording in the background to assist with immersion.Play Count: 815